Starting daycare...

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ps99472

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We're starting our 2 year old in daycare this week.  Any advance tips to avoid tearshed, tantrum, screaming, etc.?  Our daycare says that they don't recommend us to stay with our child after dropping off and to just leave (more of the tear the band-aid off approach).  Being our first and only child we're scared like any other first timer parents.  We're dreading the phone call from daycare while we're at work...Any tips appreciated...
 
Most young ones adapt quickly.

I think the drop off and leave is more effective... with ours... they usually distracted the child with toys, books or other friends and we snuck out (no goodbyes). After a while we could properly say goodbye because they are actually excited to go to daycare.

But it's not the same for all children, I recall seeing parents which kids who still had a hard time with the separation even a few weeks in.

One funny story I will always remember when we went to pick up our child the first day, he saw his mother and was so happy and started running for her and I was standing a few feet behind her and right when he was about to go into her arms he saw me and ran around her to go to me. To this day she says I robbed her of that first hug after daycare.
 
Starlight East said:
The bigger issue was that it took time for our kid's immune system to adjust to the germs spread by the other kids.

The first months:
One week daycare, one week sick at home. Two weeks daycare, one week sick at home. Three weeks daycare, one week sick at home. After that it got much better.
Yup... and not just the kid(s)... sometimes the parents would get sick too. My co-workers would wonder how I could get sick in the middle of summer.
 
+1 to all the above comments.

Most kids adapt--some quicker than others. My toddler took a couple of weeks before the crying stopped. We did the quick drop off and simple goodbye.

And YES your kid will get sick no matter how much the daycare says they clean stuff. All kids carry germs and they will pass it to you (unless you wrap your kid in plastic). Get ready for coughs and colds.

In the end they will be happy and you will survive this parenting milestone.  :)
 
irvinehomeowner said:
One funny story I will always remember when we went to pick up our child the first day, he saw his mother and was so happy and started running for her and I was standing a few feet behind her and right when he was about to go into her arms he saw me and ran around her to go to me.

To this day she says I robbed her of that first hug after daycare.

I just love this story. LOL.
 
Dropped of my little one for the first time this morning, kept the goodbye simple with a hug, but kid wouldn't let go... the teacher had to pull her away...  one of the most emotional moments walking away from the preschool...  Called a little bit later to check up on her.. cried on and off..  but doing ok...  wife picked up later... didn't eat much at school and ate 3 meals worth for dinner at home...  glad today was over.. and it wasn't as bad as I thought..  no bite marks.. made friends... hopefully next week will be the same. 
 
One additional suggestion... if at all possible, show up early to the daycare and have a little one-on-one time, before the day starts. She'll do better and better as she sees her new friends show up.

We're on our last year of preschool for our youngest son, which is hard to fathom. Enjoy the time as it passes quickly!

-IrvineDad
 
So 2 weeks passed, my 2 year old did not cry at all this week when I dropped off... she seems to do well at preschool.  the director told my wife they were surprised how fast she adjusted being only there twice a week.  no major sickness yet...  got some sniffles/cold first week but nothing after that..  relieved relieved relieved..
 
Regarding getting sick all the time, I think it's better for the kids in the long term.  Their bodies are building immunities that'll help them fight things as they get older.
 
Ok so the other day my wife arrives to pick up our little one at preschool and was told by the teacher that we shouldn't coddle her too much.  She said that ourdaughter was very needy today, wanted her hands held, wanted to be carried, and took forever to put her toys away. My wife was taken aback by this as our daughter was doing fine prior to this.  When my wife went to get our daughter outside, she found her crying by herself in the corner of the playground.  Then my wife noticed my daughter was limping when she stood up and walked to her.  My wife then pointed this out to the teacher and told her this is probably why she was being so needy today due to her injury.  The teacher was speechless and seem unaware that our daughter had a limp nor that she was sobbing her head off in the corner of the Playground away from the other kids.  I called the director the next day to voice my concerns, the director did not apologize and seems very defensive about it.  When I told her my daughter said she got hurt in the morning she kept saying the kids were inside in the morning and that it was probably when they were playing outside.  I don't know why she is being so defensive about it,  kids get hurt, we understand, but teachers need to be aware of it and not let them cry in the corner by themselves.  We're in the market for another Preschool now, what a waste of time.
 
ps99472 said:
Ok so the other day my wife arrives to pick up our little one at preschool and was told by the teacher that we shouldn't coddle her too much.  She said that ourdaughter was very needy today, wanted her hands held, wanted to be carried, and took forever to put her toys away. My wife was taken aback by this as our daughter was doing fine prior to this.  When my wife went to get our daughter outside, she found her crying by herself in the corner of the playground.  Then my wife noticed my daughter was limping when she stood up and walked to her.  My wife then pointed this out to the teacher and told her this is probably why she was being so needy today due to her injury.  The teacher was speechless and seem unaware that our daughter had a limp nor that she was sobbing her head off in the corner of the Playground away from the other kids.  I called the director the next day to voice my concerns, the director did not apologize and seems very defensive about it.  When I told her my daughter said she got hurt in the morning she kept saying the kids were inside in the morning and that it was probably when they were playing outside.  I don't know why she is being so defensive about it,  kids get hurt, we understand, but teachers need to be aware of it and not let them cry in the corner by themselves.  We're in the market for another Preschool now, what a waste of time.

Hope your daughter is okay. Which preschool did this happen at?
 
My daughter is ok, the limp is not as bad today though still apparent.  I was just angry that we got blamed for bad parenting when the teacher failed to notice our daughter was injured and that was why she was so needy.  Unfortunately switching preschool is not that easy, I think I will give notice to our current preschool next week, and hopefully find another within a month.  I could be overreacting, but when it comes to kids, especially mine, I don't care. 

This is at IUCC, between Jenny Hart and St. Paul's.  Sad thing is, we picked this school due to the high recommendation of my wife's friend.  I guess everyone has different experiences/expectations. 

I'm looking into NAEYC accredited schools... like the fact they can do unannounced inspections of schools to maintain their accreditation.  But the problem is they're pretty much all wait listed... Anyone know of any openings?  Anywhere in Irvine is fine... even venture into Tustin if necessary. 
 
ps99472 said:
per another members suggestion.. Anneliese schools seem pretty impressive... here's their daily schedule
http://annelieseschools.com/pdf/willowbrook_nursery_schedule.pdf

Sorry to hear what happened.  I don't like to hear when teachers/directors appear uncaring of little ones...

I know of one parent who sends her son to Annaeliese in Laguna.  Her son is particularly short for his age and was excluded and made fun of at his school in Oak Creek.  She moved him to Annaeliese and he is apparently thriving.  She mentioned that he has so many friends now and that he is so happy.  She is also very happy with the program.
 
Try calling the Northwood Montessori in Irvine.  If you are on their wait list and ready right now (maybe even explain what happened), they may make an exception.  We've been there for 5 years now with our kids and would never even imagine something like what you experienced happening.  I'm so sorry for your experience.
 
IrvineMommie2 said:
Try calling the Northwood Montessori in Irvine.  If you are on their wait list and ready right now (maybe even explain what happened), they may make an exception.  We've been there for 5 years now with our kids and would never even imagine something like what you experienced happening.  I'm so sorry for your experience.

We're on the wait list there...  very impressive and the director seems very strict (we were verbally chastised for being a few minutes late for our tour).  So you really think calling them will work?  I'll try later today..
 
If you don't continually call NW Montessori, they will forget about you.  You have to show an interest in their program.  Everytime they call, they track it or something.

We still haven't received a call for our kids and its been like 3 years.  They said they would move the waitlist date for our 2nd child to use the day we signed up for our first child.  Still nothing.  But we have since moved on to a different school anyways where our daughter loves it.

 
I agree, with Northwood Montessori, you need to be very proactive and call and call and call.  If they just happen to have a spot available, they'll pull someone that's not next on the wait list.  I've seen them make exceptions time and time again so you never know what will happen.  Also, something they will probably never tell you... there are usually spots that open up in January in the preschool classes because sometimes they'll move preschoolers that are ready for Kindegarten into the Kindegarten classes. 
 
ps99472 said:
per another members suggestion.. Anneliese schools seem pretty impressive... here's their daily schedule
http://annelieseschools.com/pdf/willowbrook_nursery_schedule.pdf


I looked into this school. I had 2 big problems:

1) They are in the middle of nowhere...eg. the 133 and that freeway gets clogged up. Plus, on rainy days, it will be a pain to get to...

2) That place is prone to cave-ins on the hill above. Did you know that after the last big rains, they had some damage to the school due to mud slides?


Just my 2c
 
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