My Sense of Entitlement

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IrvineRenter_IHB

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I write on the main blog a great deal about the sense of entitlement of OC residents. It is appalling, mostly because it is built on a foundation of borrowed money.



As I sit here, I am looking out the window of my office watching this family washing the car of a coworker. This man and his wife are both applying elbow grease to clean this guys car, and they are smiling and joking with each other as they work. Their young son is playing in the front seat of their old truck--a truck loading with cleaning equipment to wash cars. He is not whining about hanging out with mom and dad. This guy does very good work, and takes pride in doing a good job.



As I watch this, I am acutely aware of my own sense of entitlement to my comfortable life in Irvine. This recession has also made me aware of just how easily that life could disappear. I ask myself if I would go out with my wife and son and wash cars if I get laid off; I say "no." The sense of entitlement that reveals in me is embarrassing.
 
I feel ya, IR. Every time I'm driving home in the early morning from work, I drive past the strawberry fields on Sand Canyon and see all the workers hunched over picking berries, doing back-breaking work. I feel like a spoiled brat and have no right to complain about my job. I see this again on the hot afternoons when I drive past another berry field. I sit in my air-conditioned vehicle at a red light, complaining to myself about the wait. Then I look at them and it changes my attitude. We may not have everything, but we already have it so much better than many people could even hope to have it.
 
[quote author="IrvineRenter" date=1242350721]I write on the main blog a great deal about the sense of entitlement of OC residents. It is appalling, mostly because it is built on a foundation of borrowed money.



As I sit here, I am looking out the window of my office watching this family washing the car of a coworker. This man and his wife are both applying elbow grease to clean this guys car, and they are smiling and joking with each other as they work. Their young son is playing in the front seat of their old truck--a truck loading with cleaning equipment to wash cars. He is not whining about hanging out with mom and dad. This guy does very good work, and takes pride in doing a good job.



As I watch this, I am acutely aware of my own sense of entitlement to my comfortable life in Irvine. This recession has also made me aware of just how easily that life could disappear. I ask myself if I would go out with my wife and son and wash cars if I get laid off; I say "no." The sense of entitlement that reveals in me is embarrassing.</blockquote>


Oddly enough, I wouldn't have a problem washing cars, flippin' burgers, digging trenches, whatever to make some cash if I couldn't find a job. I come from a lower middle class military family background and no matter how long I live here, it'll never change my fundamentals. My dad worked his butt off for our family (he was working two blue collar jobs after he retired from the Navy) to keep us solvent and eventually inch our way up the socio-economic ladder. I'd do the same and then some if it meant a better life for my kids... Whatever it takes.
 
I have poor reading comprehension skills so I usually have to read things a few times before I understand what is trying to be said (but I also have undiagosed ADD which means I can barely read things once).



Anyway, the first time I read through your post I understood it to mean that your co-workers were the ones with a sense of entitlement. I grew up parents who washed their own cars and I have followed suit. Of course that means driving to their house which has an adequate driveway for this purpose. Occasionally when my car is filthy i go to the car wash on Alton near Jeffrey and I feel so guilty that I am too lazy to do this myself. I end up tipping more than the price of the wash even though they do an inadequate job.
 
I hired someone to clean my condo last year. It was a young lady. She was in her early 20's. As she was cleaning the bathroom, my wife and I was watching tv. Then we both looked at each other. We turned off the tv. We just looked at each other and I whispered to my wife, "Should I go and help?" I felt really guilty. Here I am a grown man. Thank God, I am healthy. And I had nothing to do. Why am I not cleaning my own house? Why am I so good that someone has to clean the house for me?



We paid her and I told my wife. Never again am I going to hire someone to clean my own house. I know sometimes it's economic. I am sure the cleaning lady needed the income. But something doesn't sit well with me when a human being has to serve or clean for me just b/c I am too lazy.
 
[quote author="reason" date=1242352269]I hired someone to clean my condo last year. It was a young lady. She was in her early 20's. As she was cleaning the bathroom, my wife and I was watching tv. Then we both looked at each other. We turned off the tv. We just looked at each other and I whispered to my wife, "Should I go and help?" I felt really guilty. Here I am a grown man. Thank God, I am healthy. And I had nothing to do. Why am I not cleaning my own house? Why am I so good that someone has to clean the house for me?



We paid her and I told my wife. Never again am I going to hire someone to clean my own house. I know sometimes it's economic. I am sure the cleaning lady needed the income. But something doesn't sit well with me when a human being has to serve or clean for me just b/c I am too lazy.</blockquote>


We have someone that cleans the house, while we are at work, not because we are lazy but rather to maximize our quality time with the kids. When they are old enough to help clean, we can all punch it out together, maybe even have some fun doing it, and we won't hire outside help. Until then, we'll keep using someone as long as we can afford it...
 
Why this is still funny to me? I will never know...



<img src="http://i220.photobucket.com/albums/dd50/lcdlove/ricky-gervais-youre-awesome.gif" alt="" />
 
[quote author="ipoplaya" date=1242352504][quote author="reason" date=1242352269]I hired someone to clean my condo last year. It was a young lady. She was in her early 20's. As she was cleaning the bathroom, my wife and I was watching tv. Then we both looked at each other. We turned off the tv. We just looked at each other and I whispered to my wife, "Should I go and help?" I felt really guilty. Here I am a grown man. Thank God, I am healthy. And I had nothing to do. Why am I not cleaning my own house? Why am I so good that someone has to clean the house for me?



We paid her and I told my wife. Never again am I going to hire someone to clean my own house. I know sometimes it's economic. I am sure the cleaning lady needed the income. But something doesn't sit well with me when a human being has to serve or clean for me just b/c I am too lazy.</blockquote>


We have someone that cleans the house, while we are at work, not because we are lazy but rather to maximize our quality time with the kids. When they are old enough to help clean, we can all punch it out together, maybe even have some fun doing it, and we won't hire outside help. Until then, we'll keep using someone as long as we can afford it...</blockquote>


I'm waiting until the kids are old enough and then they can work down the mines and bring in some money
 
[quote author="ipoplaya" date=1242352504][quote author="reason" date=1242352269]I hired someone to clean my condo last year. It was a young lady. She was in her early 20's. As she was cleaning the bathroom, my wife and I was watching tv. Then we both looked at each other. We turned off the tv. We just looked at each other and I whispered to my wife, "Should I go and help?" I felt really guilty. Here I am a grown man. Thank God, I am healthy. And I had nothing to do. Why am I not cleaning my own house? Why am I so good that someone has to clean the house for me?



We paid her and I told my wife. Never again am I going to hire someone to clean my own house. I know sometimes it's economic. I am sure the cleaning lady needed the income. But something doesn't sit well with me when a human being has to serve or clean for me just b/c I am too lazy.</blockquote>


We have someone that cleans the house, while we are at work, not because we are lazy but rather to maximize our quality time with the kids. When they are old enough to help clean, we can all punch it out together, maybe even have some fun doing it, and we won't hire outside help. Until then, we'll keep using someone as long as we can afford it...</blockquote>


We have the house cleaned as well, for a similar reason, not to spend time with the kids (we dont have any) but to maximize the time with each other. My wife and I both work alot, the last thing we want to do is spend time on the weekend cleaning the house when we dont spend as much time as we would like with each other during the week.
 
[quote author="IrvineRenter" date=1242350721]I ask myself if I would go out with my wife and son and wash cars if I get laid off; I say "no."</blockquote>
I'll give you more credit than that.



I'm sure you'll do whatever it takes to make sure your family is taken care of... it may not be washing cars but you'll be surprised how low your comfort level goes when things get desperate.



You never know... maybe that guy is looking at you and your desk job and telling himself he could never do that, even if there were no more cars to wash.
 
[quote author="irvine_home_owner" date=1242367004]it may not be washing cars but you'll be surprised how low your comfort level goes when things get desperate.

</blockquote>


Agreed.

<img src="http://images.movieeye.com/store/images/fun-with-dick-and-jane-dvd-poster.jpg" alt="" />
 
[quote author="irvine_home_owner" date=1242367004][quote author="IrvineRenter" date=1242350721]I ask myself if I would go out with my wife and son and wash cars if I get laid off; I say "no."</blockquote>
I'll give you more credit than that.



I'm sure you'll do whatever it takes to make sure your family is taken care of... it may not be washing cars but you'll be surprised how low your comfort level goes when things get desperate.



You never know... maybe that guy is looking at you and your desk job and telling himself he could never do that, even if there were no more cars to wash.</blockquote>


This makes me wonder... what are the most menial types of jobs you all have had in your lives? When I was in highschool, I wanted to go to college very badly so I got a second job after school (already had one job after school & on weekends in retail.) An older couple I knew, ran a small cleaning business doing offices, so there I was. I felt at my lowest point cleaning out mens' urinals. But there was nothing I wouldn't do for the chance to attend college. Unfortunately, it was not enough. I am still glad I did that though because it makes me appreciate mine and my husband's opportunities now. Coming from a blue collared family, though, I already was aware of how it is from a laborer's point of view. Well what kind of jobs have you all held?
 
Just came back from the Anaheim Convention Center; we have a show this weekend... Just carried about 30 huge heavy cardboard boxes from the parking garage to the show floor with a small dolly... Only one other worker showed up; we were at it for almost 2-hours! Do I have to do this, heck no! Will he had to do all of it, if I hadn't showed up, sure would! We had a good chat, while sweating and lifting boxes, he's one of the good hard-working warehouse workers; and I'm the top performer at the Co... do you think the boss see this? Heck yeah...
 
[quote author="SoCal78" date=1242368462][quote author="irvine_home_owner" date=1242367004][quote author="IrvineRenter" date=1242350721]I ask myself if I would go out with my wife and son and wash cars if I get laid off; I say "no."</blockquote>
I'll give you more credit than that.



I'm sure you'll do whatever it takes to make sure your family is taken care of... it may not be washing cars but you'll be surprised how low your comfort level goes when things get desperate.



You never know... maybe that guy is looking at you and your desk job and telling himself he could never do that, even if there were no more cars to wash.</blockquote>


This makes me wonder... what are the most menial types of jobs you all have had in your lives? When I was in highschool, I wanted to go to college very badly so I got a second job after school (already had one job after school & on weekends in retail.) An older couple I knew, ran a small cleaning business doing offices, so there I was. I felt at my lowest point cleaning out mens' urinals. But there was nothing I wouldn't do for the chance to attend college. Unfortunately, it was not enough. I am still glad I did that though because it makes me appreciate mine and my husband's opportunities now. Coming from a blue collared family, though, I already was aware of how it is from a laborer's point of view. Well what kind of jobs have you all held?</blockquote>


Mickey D's for me. Had to clean the bathrooms there on occassion. That was pretty bad. I also helped out at with a friend's dad's carpet business moving furniture in offices and demoing old nasty carpet. Hard work, but the pay was pretty good.
 
[quote author="IrvineRenter" date=1242350721]I write on the main blog a great deal about the sense of entitlement of OC residents. It is appalling, mostly because it is built on a foundation of borrowed money.



As I sit here, I am looking out the window of my office watching this family washing the car of a coworker. This man and his wife are both applying elbow grease to clean this guys car, and they are smiling and joking with each other as they work. Their young son is playing in the front seat of their old truck--a truck loading with cleaning equipment to wash cars. He is not whining about hanging out with mom and dad. This guy does very good work, and takes pride in doing a good job.



As I watch this, I am acutely aware of my own sense of entitlement to my comfortable life in Irvine. This recession has also made me aware of just how easily that life could disappear. I ask myself if I would go out with my wife and son and wash cars if I get laid off; I say "no." The sense of entitlement that reveals in me is embarrassing.</blockquote>


Introspection is usually good and healthy, but I find it curious you would credit a ?sense of entitlement? to the rejection of menial labor. Are you uneducated? Have you so few marketable skills or ambition that you would even consider a car washing position as an option if you were laid off? Assuming for a moment you <em>did</em> find yourself in a menial position, where and what would the family you outlined be doing? For there to be a job car washing means someone else is adding more value to society to be able to afford the car and payment for the washing.



I understand the philosophy of doing any and everything required to provide for the family, but to suggest your presumable professional skills are equivalent to a sense of entitlement from not doing menial labor speaks more to your personal insecurities. There are reasons some people have more success, money and security than others and it often has as much or more to do with personal decisions than any cumulative effect of life circumstances. Sense of entitlement??? Hardly, America was/is not built on a social caste system.



Sorry if you started this thread looking for affirmation. When I see the car washers and yard guys, I acknowledge the differences between them and me but it does not elicit a sense of entitlement in me, or a disdain for them. I worked and applied effort to bring about that difference. As you pointed out in your description of the family, economic prosperity does not necessarily mean I am any happier in life than they.
 
<blockquote>This makes me wonder... what are the most menial types of jobs you all have had in your lives? When I was in highschool, I wanted to go to college very badly so I got a second job after school (already had one job after school & on weekends in retail.) An older couple I knew, ran a small cleaning business doing offices, so there I was. I felt at my lowest point cleaning out mens' urinals. But there was nothing I wouldn't do for the chance to attend college. Unfortunately, it was not enough. I am still glad I did that though because it makes me appreciate mine and my husband's opportunities now. Coming from a blue collared family, though, I already was aware of how it is from a laborer's point of view. Well what kind of jobs have you all held?</blockquote>


My husband once had a job washing and sanitizing ankle-bracelets for people who were released from house-arrest. From what I understand, it was pretty disgusting.



I am of the attitude that you can never take your achievements for granted. It could all be gone one day. Next time you see a homeless person, talk to him/her. Give them a few bucks. Volunteer your time.



There is a saying, "But for the grace of God go I". Take heed.
 
I am glad I moved away from Irvine for this reason. This stepford environment will pull you into the sense of entitlement. Both parents and children alike get sucked into the black hole of entitlement. Irvine is a place where people can buy their way into the upper class society and ditch their root. A leopard can't never remove its spot.



It is the faults of parents for spoiling their children growing up in the bubble. Showering them with expensive toys that the house no longer holds. Materialism and competition harvest caste and rivalry attitude.
 
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