Expat Observations from a world traveler 2005 (WARNING: OT & Long)

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Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Expat Vampires



I remember once watching a movie on TV about a young man who had just been bitten by a vampire, and who was in the process to becoming one as a result. He was lectured by an older veteran on the particulars of a vampire's life. There were big disadvantages- such as one could not go out in the sun lest one be burnt to a crisp, for one. One had to stock up on blood, and food became unnecessary, hence no true enjoyment of eating anymore. Naturally, things like love and marriage would also be out of the question from now on, as well as being able to simply participate in the normal affairs of society. And, most of all, one could never, ever become a normal human being again. There were advantages, however, too. A vampire would be a hard creature to kill. Common diseases would not take him/her. One was not always alone, as there were many vampires out there, and they would recognize their own and often befriend him/her. One could walk on ceilings, one did not have to worry about getting a job and, most of all, one did not age as fast. It took some six years of a vampire's life to gain one human year. Hence, one could look forward to a youth that would last a good 200 years vs. some 30-35 years. One would become wise and solemn the way most vampires were, and one would learn the exquisite pleasure of consuming blood as it would now become the absolute elixir of life, more delicious than any wine ever produced, or any nectar drunk by Gods heretofore.



I realize that it may be a long stretch of my imagination, but somehow, I compare becoming an expat to becoming such a vampire. We lose a lot of things by expatriating, and by moving into sometimes unfriendly societies, we sometimes become like silent ghosts whom the natives view as strange novelties, sometimes admiring and sometimes fearing. We can no longer participate as actively in our new societies of which we are not citizens; and even if we become citizens, we never quite fit in, often because we may not be fully allowed to. We have to deal with visas, work permits, new languages and customs and we get all sorts of reactions from people, ranging from joyful hospitality to complete rejection and even hatred. As vampires, we are often alone among the average folks, only able to relate to other expats. We sometimes go through months or years of silent agony of being among people whose ranks we cannot ever truly join.



There are many advantages, as well. There are about 200,000,000 of us all around the world, people who have started looking for opportunities in new lands. We should unite and help each other and give guidance to each other the way vampires often help their own ilk. We can use our being different to our advantage. If we are not attractive as employees, friends or partners in our old countries, we can always find a place where we will be valued more. If we are too young, we can go to a location where being young is not a disadvantage. If we are too old, we can also go to a place where older people are respected more. We can learn to quietly but quickly slither off to yet another destination in search of new opportunities, such as can only be known to international persons like ourselves. To vampires, a silent, vast and scary world of the night becomes their huge domain while other people sleep, and to us, the unknown chasm in between cultures also becomes our huge terrain in which we can make money, meet exciting new people and have the time of our lives. Like vampires, we can sometimes make friends with others like ourselves, but we are mostly on our own and are as independent as one can be. Other people are climbing social and corporate ladders in their countries, thinking that these are the only ladders that can be climbed, worrying about their image in their society and what their neighbors will say. We do not do so as much, as the possibilities that we have in front of us are mostly very unconventional and with far less competition. Since we are never truly members of our host nations, we care less about trying to be like everybody else, and can remain ourselves more. If things go haywire in the country where we are at, and we are lucky to get away unscathed, we can quickly rebuild our lives in a new host nation; something that other people can never do. And like vampires, we can never become "normal" again. Wanderlust, as the vampirical search for blood, is forever in our veins as we always look forward to new frontiers and new adventures. We are often misunderstood, and only another expat can relate to what we are going through, just like only another vampire can understand the problems that their kind goes through.



We may not have been bitten by another expat so as to become citizens of the world, but we may have been bitten by society that refused to provide us with what we needed. But, once you are an expat, you are always an expat and there is no going back. We might as well get comfortable with our identity as there is almost never a way to get rid of it in favor of reverting back to one?s previous form. Too bad, we cannot live 300 years to prolong our ability to do so.



But then, again, who knows? Maybe there is an expat somewhere who has been bitten by a vampire and I am telling you, he is the luckiest dude of them all!
 
Sunday, December 04, 2005

Living Your Own Expat Dreams



Most human beings do not create dreams independently. Most of us lack information as to where we should be heading in order to attain maximum satisfaction, and we form goals that are often dictated by society- our parents, fellow students, relatives and friends. We want to be doctors or lawyers, or actors because these are respected professions according to what people around us tell us. We want to be respected. So, we choose one of them as "our goal". However, most often than not, we were nudged into such goal by nothing but peer pressure, and advice from people who know, or think they know, better than we do.



The same goes for countries. Few people venture into unknown/uncharted territories. Most of us want to avoid countries that are seen as "bad", unprestigious or unknown. That is why we want to go where everybody else goes, someplace that is classy and "in", so that next time when we are at a dinner table, and are telling our friends that we had been living in such and such a place, they will say "Wow"! If we work in Rome, or Hong Kong, or New York, or even Dubai, it is better than being in Bratislava or Asuncion,or Libreville; or so we think. No one will say "wow" if we go there. Plus, human nature prefers something known to something unknown, so we follow the crowd. By doing that, we often end up in expensive places where job competition is high and where people are unfriendly. Or worse, we find ourselves living in cultures where we do not quite feel comfortable with the people, hence, our stay there becomes miserable.



A friend of mine is an old-time resident of Thailand, and, for years he had been convincing me to move there, find work and live a happy life ever after. He sang praises to the country, the friendliness of its people, the beauty of the women and the exquisiteness of the Thai culture in general. So, since he was one of my best friends, one day I decided to take the plunge, and obtained a job in the Kingdom. It proved to be a disaster. I am very good at languages and I became fluent in Thai within a year. I studied the culture thoroughly, but, in spite of all my efforts, I could not help feeling that I made a severe mistake by moving there. Something about Thailand and "me" simply did not click. My personality, my character, my whole set of values were completely different. Thais like quiet and discreet people. I am gregarious and talkative. Thai people like neat and polite people. I am by nature sloppy and straight-to-the-point. Thai people do not like intellectual discussions, but prefer to speak "ngai-ngai" -just chit-chat. Knowledge is a personal thing to them. I am very much into knowledge, expression, conversation, etc. They are not. Thai people like people who dress in nice clothes; I do not dress in nice clothes. I can adjust to the culture but it implies changing myself too much. It goes against everything that I am. Hence, they did not like me so much. And the feeling was mutual.



In other words, it was a complete mismatch. Thailand and I simply did not connect. This was when I realized that the Thai dream was my friend's dream, and what was good for him was simply not good for me. Duh! One man's meat is another man's poison, as they say. No matter how hard I tried to live a normal life in Thailand, the culture was as alien to me as it could ever get. And it was not just the East/ West thing. I lived in some very traditional areas of Japan and I seemed to relate to people quite well. With Thailand it was just total incompatibility.



When I arrived in the Philippines some years later, a country that is not on many a travelers' list, I felt like I was a hand, and the Philippines was a glove. I fit right in. The way people behaved, talked, acted with friends, the way they sang songs and carried on discussions was very similar to the way I did the same things. Filipinos dressed modestly, so did I. They were intellectual, so was I. They enjoyed someone who was a joker, a talkative and gregarious person. Unlike in Thailand where they would always tell me to "shut up", the Filipinos wanted me to talk more and would sit there and listen to me for hours. They liked me and I liked them. I was like a star to them. Or so I felt. Whereas in Thailand I always felt that I was somewhat of a nuisance.



When I invited my Thailand-based friend to come over to the Philippines to visit the country, he did just that, but he felt out of place. He and the Filipinos simply did not "chime". Something was missing for him there. He became distressed and ended up going back to Thailand. So, while Thailand was good for him, I wound up living in the Philippines on and off for 15 years after that. We ( the Philippines and I) simply 'clicked'. Thailand and I, on the other had, did not click at all.



The moral of the story is this: just because a country is in the news and everybody including your best friend is singing praises to it, it does not mean that it will necessarily be a good country for 'YOU'. Go there and see how you and the people there "jive". It may or may not be a good match. Ask yourself how you feel there after a few weeks or so. There is that certain something that you will feel. It is kind of like ' love'. An affinity.You will feel the same when you meet a person of the opposite sex that you are considering falling in love with. Either there is chemistry or there isn't. If you force it, it will be pure misery, even if your parents think it's a match made in heaven.



Do not live another man's dream by blindly following him to a country X. You may adopt bits and pieces of the dream, maybe, his general approach to making such international dreams come true, his pioneer spirit and courage to move to another place, but it will have to be tweaked somewhat to fit your own requirements, including going to a whole different country to live, if necessary. What may be a good place for him, may turn out to be a total hell for you. Also, try and venture a bit off the beaten path. A job in Lithuania rather than in the Czech republic, for example, may be the best thing that has ever happened to you. Everybody was going to Prague, but you found out that Vilnius was where you belonged more. Some of your friends grimaced " Where is that?" , but you did not shrink away from the place because it was not as glamorous as moving to Prague. Later, you may learn that it may have been the best decision you have ever made.



Dare to be different. Follow your dreams even if you do not know 'where' they will come true. It is still better than blindly following another person's itinerary.
 
Stopover Forays into Great Cities.



Would you like to travel cheaply? I have come up with one way to visit famous cities at a fraction of the cost. Whenever I go somewhere, I buy cheaper tickets with stopovers in famous parts of the world. When I was working in Saudi Arabia, the flight from there to the US was never direct. There would always be a stopover either in Frankfurt or Amsterdam or London. And every time I went to visit my girlfriend in the Philippines, there would be a stopover in Singapore. If you are lucky, you can get a stopover that is six hours long or longer and then you can go and visit the country that you are stopping over in.



I always wanted to visit London, see Big Ben, walk on one of those bridges over the Thames and have my picture taken in front of the Westminster Abbey. So, on my way to Saudi out of the US, there was a six-hour stopover in London. ?Let's go see Big Ben?, I said to myself and bolted out of the airport. I asked a lady at the information booth as to where I could take the underground and she pointed me in the right direction. I got on the tube, and it took me to some hub station somewhere on the outskirts of the city. Then, I changed to another line and it took me straight to Westminster Station. I walked out of it and there was Big Ben right in front of me. My breathing stopped. It was just as beautiful as what I imagined it to be. Run, run, run! The sun was setting. I asked some tourists to take my picture in front of it. The picture was taken. I then took more pictures- the Abbey, the Thames, the people walking around. I walked along a few streets, wondered into a pub, had a beer and eavesdropped on Brits having a conversation about business.



I ran out of the pub, went to a restaurant and ordered some British dishes- It was a kidney pie or a shepherd pie or one of those things. I gobbled down the meal, looked at my watch and ran out again to try and experience more of the city. It was getting dark. No more pictures were possible. Hey, no problem. I kept looking at the people, trying to absorb some of the moods of the city which the people were displaying on their faces. They all seemed somewhat solemn in the way they carried themselves, and addressed each other as they walked. I wondered around again and then rushed back to the tube. Time was running out. I had to be at the airport two hours before the departure time so that I would have enough time to go through security. Again, I rode the underground, with my guitar and heavy bags by my side. Again, I changed trains and finally arrived at the airport. I had been to London, seen Big Ben and the Abbey, eaten British food and drunk British beer. All for free ( kind of).



Once I was flying from Kenya to the US and there was a six-hour stopover in Amsterdam. Again, I ran like crazy through the immigration, got on the train, and arrived at the center of the city at 6:00 am. It was still dark. I started roaming around the central area while the dawn was just beginning to break. I was able to take some pictures but they came out dark (of course). Still the gothic buildings could be seen and the tramcars, and the stores were clearly visible. I walked along the canals and watched seagulls fly around. Then, as restaurants opened up, I went in and ordered some Dutch food. Having eaten the food, I walked out again and asked a Dutch man who was roaming around to take a picture of me. And there I was, in the middle of the Netherlands, with a few more hours to enjoy the city. I walked around again looking into store windows. Walked into a coffee shop that had a marijuana leaf displayed in the window. There was a whole bunch of people sitting there with silly smiles on their faces. These were high on pot. I saw tourists with Middle Eastern faces walk into the shop and the clerk who opened up a big box with all sorts of marijuana in it. I could not believe my eyes. It seemed like something out of the twilight zone. My natural reaction was: "The cops will be here any minute now". I told the clerk about how I still had the American reaction to pot, i.e., it was something illegal. He said that while it was legal in Holland all right , it was heavily regulated and there were many rules as to how stores were supposed to sell it. So, it was still not completely free according to him. Still, I was fascinated. It was free enough for me. Since I was going to Saudi Arabia, I did not want to chance it and just sat down and watched other people get high.



Time was running out and I hailed a gray Mercedes taxi to go back to the airport. It was driven by a Dutch citizen of Surinamian extraction. He immediately asked me if I wanted to see the Red Light district. Sure, why not? I might as well. So, he took me to the narrow collection of mediaeval streets in which I saw some ladies sit in windows on some things that looked like bar stools. Since it was still early in the morning, many of the stools were unoccupied, but there were some Latin American-looking ladies that were smiling at me and beaconing me to come in. The price for one shot, he said, was EU 50. Some $60 US. Again, since I had to be at the airport some two hours before the flight would leave, plus I did not want to cheat on my girlfriend and chance a disease, I politely declined all offers.



I gave the driver $100 and he told me that it was his first time to see $100 American dollars. Anyway, he took me back to the airport and gave me some $30 in change. Expensive as hell, but who cares. I still visited Amsterdam for less than $100. Not a bad deal. Also, as the sun rose, I was able to take more pictures and almost used up a whole roll of film. The mini- visit was a success. I have visited Holland, seen the famous marijuana coffee shops and the Red Light district, observed the canals and eaten Dutch food.



On another occasion, I was flying from Argentina to the Philippines- a very long voyage that took me across two oceans and three continents. It was July, so it was also quite cold in the Southern Hemisphere. No matter. The airplane was to stop over in Johannesburg, South Africa. I was always fascinated by South Africa. The Anglo-Boer war, Nelson Mandela and the movie? Cry Freedom", the way the country had been in the news almost every day during the times of Apartheid, always made me want to visit it just to see what was going on there. Anyway, once we got to the airport in Joburg, I found out that I only had five hours.



"Run like hell", I said to myself. I went through the immigration and watched with curiosity as an African lady put a "Temporary Residence Permit" sticker into my passport. ?It was going to be the most temporary permit she had ever given?- I said to myself. I ran faster to change my dollars into Rands. I could not believe that I was now inside of South Africa, a country I had read so much about when I was in still in elementary school. A tall black guy was hanging out near the exit. I told him: "Take me to see Johannesburg. We have about one hour and a half". He said:" Five hundred rand". It was somewhere around $80- not bad. We got into his car and came out of the airport parking lot. I was watching in disbelief as the boards said "Johannesburg". I saw the skyscrapers in the distance. This time my camera was digital and I proceeded to film the whole thing. The car was taking me into the center of the city built on gold. The very thought that I was going into the city of" two Johannes" took my breath away. Was it me in the country of Nelson Mandela? Yup. It was me. The driver took me to Soweto. I could not believe it. I was standing in front of Nelson Mandela's Museum and looking around at the township of Soweto. Next, the driver took me through the center of the city. It was just like any American city- Detroit or Cincinnati, the same architecture, except that the traffic was on the left side of the road and the people were blacks did not look like the American blacks. There were many people in tribal clothes- in short, these were real Africans.



I saw only two or three white faces in Joburg. It was now a completely African city. However, I saw some European -looking people at the local 7eleven. They looked somewhat like Van Gogh characters and they spoke something that sounded like German. I surmised that these were the famous Boers, Africa's white tribe.



I asked the driver to take me somewhere where I could buy real African food. He drove me through the city and through the suburbs and we could not find it. There was MacDonalds and KFC and Shakey?s but nothing African . I walked into the local convenience store and asked a lady to show me if there was an African drink somewhere. She gave me a weird look and pointed to a can with label of a lychee-like fruit on it. I bought some and then we went back to the airport. I had my picture taken in Joburg, Soweto and also, filmed the whole trip there and back to the airport. I was finally able to buy some African food when back inside the airport building- it was, very prosaically, chicken with rice.



The whole tour of South Africa was roughly two hours and cost me again under US$100. Not a bad deal. I can now say that I have been to South Africa because I have, haven't I? I even have the residency permit to prove it. I lived there exactly 120 minutes.



The stopover forays into foreign countries may not be very comfortable or comprehensive but they sure are cheap and, if we learn to pack a lot of activities into the crazily limited time we have there, they sure are worth the hundred bucks.
 
The Song of an Unwanted Man



To be unwanted isn't something awful

For if we aren?t on somebody's menu list,

We thus may not be drawn into affairs unlawful

Or placed beneath that someone's heavy fist.



To be unwanted by society is not so gloomy

It may just be that we are left alone

To be ourselves, in private space that?s roomy,

Where solitude becomes a precious stone.



To be unneeded means- we?re not exploited

And sundry parasites won?t bleed us dry,

"Unwanted" means they just will be avoided,

As long as they leech others, should we cry?



Unwanted means: at peace and undisrupted,

Un-bother'd, un-disturbed and un-confused.

With rigid canons un-imposed and un-adopted,

We'll stay serene, undaunted and un-used.
 
The Budget Traveler's Guide to Sleeping in Airports



<a href="http://www.sleepinginairports.com/">http://www.sleepinginairports.com/</a>



<img src="http://www.sleepinginairports.com/images/SIA_front.gif" alt="" />
 
When I was a student, I spent two weeks in Europe without any lodging expenses. I had a 1st class Eurail Pass and every night I would go to a train station and get on a train that went somewhere 4 hours away. I would then sleep on the train and when I arrived, I would get on another train heading back to where I came from and the next morning I would be where I started the night before, refreshed and with no hotel expenses. Also, most large train stations had showers and other such amenities.



This strategy failed one night when I got on a train I though would stop in Cologne but actually continued to the DDR (I slept through the Colonge stop). I was awakened at the border by East German border guards with flashlights and Kalashnikovs demanding to see my papers. I had to pay a $50 penalty/bribe to get back to West Germany.
 
Apu gets his US citizenship:

Lisa - "You know, in a way, all Americans are immigrants. Except, of course Native Americans."

Homer - "Yeah, Native Americans like us"

Lisa - "No, I mean American Indians"

Apu - "Like me"
 
I totally agree with the "two souls in two lands" idea, because I feel that way whenever I go back to Hong Kong where I was born.



Then the "leaving a piece of you behind" freaked me out! I thought I was the only one who felt that.
 
Why America won the Cold War



There are several factors and causes and not the only one. I will illustrate:



America is everything Russia is not.



America is a very practical culture with a practical mind and a great deal of common sense. There is also the inherent discipline inherited from the Germanic founders of the country. While science is not up to par among the general population, the business sense and common sense is superb. The Anglo Saxon Protestant work ethics is what keeps the country going. If an average Joe is not a good scientist, he will import scientists from overseas. Americans are problem solvers, optimists and good salesmen. The national character has a can-do note to it. People are taught to achieve and triumph., That leads to great disasters ,but also great achievements. All useless and impractical stuff is gotten rid off. The only underclass are those who are not willing to work their butts off, by and large. An average person has a dream, and that dream has a spark to it, He will go at it until it is achieved.



America also offers a large area with many states and many opportunities. It is not ravaged by foreign invaders that wipe out 20,000,000 people in four years. It has no dictators that murder 30,000,000 people and pass incongruous laws that throw the country into turmoil. People do have some power there as opposed to Russia where they have virtually none. Also, America has great location and a temperate climate. The country is not bombed routinely whenever every major war takes place. September 11 or the 'fascism' of George Bush or McCarthyism are child's play compared to Russia's disasters and tragedies.



So, from the beginning, Americans are just more fortunate, and that leads to a character or optimism and the belief that life is generally, a positive thing.



The Russian national character is impressive at first- sophisticated, good at math, well-read, philosophical and communal. But there are major flaws in it that lead to its downfall. First- there is an inherent dark gloom in their society and the Orthodox religion. It is a pessimistic culture. They do not really use God for help the way people in the Bible belt do. Religion is more ceremonial-like. They are also not good at business and never had the Protestant formula of work= American dream. It was a peasant society that had only barely entered the industrial age when the 1917 revolution happened. And the abundant and rewarding capitalism ( such as what they had built in, say, Japan) never entered Russia. After they had killed all their aristocrats, the serfs came to power, and these were bitter and uncouth and not very well educated and with no industrial/business acumen. They tried to create a system of education and a strange new economy of a never tried before variety, and were successful at some things, but the people there cannot work independently and enjoy work; they have to be forced to work because work = serfdom in the Russian mind.



An average Russian is a philosopher, philologist, idealist, a long monologue man. A dreamer. An ideolog. Not a pragmatist. He is a talker. He talks the talk but does not walk the walk. Not much of a doer unless someone forces him to. Most people are very impractical and suffer from the same emotional unpredictability as many Latin cultures. They built the USSR on slave labor and idealistic foundations without thinking through the practicalities. Some things they succeeded in , most , they did not.



They could not sell their formula of "success" to the world because it simply did not work. People do not want to live in economies where stores are empty, where you have to stand in line daily to buy basic necessities, where things are drab, where salaries are low and where you have no right to travel abroad without a permit from the government. People around the world tried their socialism and saw that while it sounded good on paper, it did not function in real life.



The American capitalism, though, functions better. It is not perfect, but stores are full of food and any item you need -anything you want to buy- is there. Any job you want to have, well, you can have it. It helps individuals succeed better than the Soviet model.



Also, the English speaking people you meet through the Internet are somewhat of an elite. The average person you meet online is sophisticated; not the one you meet on the street. The general masses are not as smart as you think. You must have never lived in a small Russian town. I have. Same rednecks as American ones with one major difference- US rednecks are still hard workers, by and large; average Russian people are not. Gloomy, dark men drinking themselves to death, beating up their wives, musing about the meaning of life while poisoning themselves with vodka. The elites there still refer to them as 'cattle'. Whereas, in the USA, the general masses are quite sophisticated, at least in what they do and are generally successful at what they do. They do not have a gloomy streak to them. People work and are forward looking. Even the reddest- necked US rednecks.



The Russians could sell their model for a while to all these 3d world countries, but soon ,they too began seeing through the smoke and mirrors. Many also did not like being dictated by the Russians. They introduced inferior technology, inferior products and they did not bring much money with them. People in many countries like money, you know.



Russia also did not offer a dream of emigrating to it and succeeding. They did not invite people to settle and give them citizenship en mass. The only time they did that was by invitng Germans when they were under their German czarina- Catherine. But they did not give Germans the nationality and treated them badly after Catherine died.



They generally do not want foreigners to come and live there. It is not a land of opportunities. Plus they can be racist as hell, too. Russia is for ethnic Russkies. America is a beacon of hope to many many people. People immigrate there, work hard and succeed by and large.Even with the US racism and all, you can still succeed, In Russia it is harder. Plus you can never become a "Russkiy" if you are not of the original Slavic stock even if you were born there. But anyone can become some kind of American, even if a hyphenated one.



So, America has endeared a lot of the world to it because of all these things. Russia did not. They tried to introduce their melancholy, dark and sentimental culture to other countries but only succeeded in doing it by force and mainly among the conquered nations- Uzbeks, Ukrainians etc. These are now banning the Russian language and trying to get rid of it, It has brought nothing practical to help people except maybe some aesthetic dreaminess and poesy.



America , otoh has a pop culture that is very attractive to masses and it has products that are on the back tail of it that sell as the culture is introduced. It is so wise and practical! First a movie about cowboys, then jeans with cowboy hats introduced and sold. Then a movie about the 50ies, then Coca- Cola is sold. Americans are presented to the world as jovial, positive, winners, and the US values look attractive to many many disadvantaged masses around the world. Most people who have gone on to America have achieved great things. Even as we are happier abroad, we are happier there, paradoxically because of American passports and citizenship. American degrees, and, well, many American cultural traits. Even succeeding at emigrating out of the US and settling as a privileged US citizen somewhere else as is also an American thing. I hope you understand what I mean. This is why I never advocate expatriating, but rather combining the US with other countries so that a complete life can be had.



But going back to the original question



The biggest reason after all the above ones was simply that the USA drove them into bankruptcy with the Arms Race. They ran out of money. They could not keep up with the American mighty military-industrial-economic complex and the US allies' similar establishments. Their empire also collapsed as people under them wanted independence and were tired of living in drab countries with no products in stores, lousy quality cars ( or no cars) and just a very boring and unfree life.



That's it, in a gyst.
 
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