garfangle_IHB
New member
<p>note: this idea is only semi-serious in the form of a parody infomercial.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Are you a depressed prospective homeowner? Frustrated that your new community is only half-built and becoming an eyesore? Worried that your once well-capitalized builder is having trouble keeping to schedule amid this housing downturn? Well don't worry; have no fear, Vulture Builders Inc. is ready and able to complete the project that your recently bankrupt home builder abandoned leaving you and your fellow neighbors-to-be in the lurch. What we do is buy the assets from the insolvent home builder for pennies on the dollar and resume development before it's too late, inviting filthy, troublesome squatters. Our experienced and licensed professionals do all the work necessary to keep the build-out on time and on schedule and take care of all the paperwork that might arise from a bankruptcy. Once we are through, all that is left is turning the house keys over to you. We ensure the neighborhood gets completed, so that families can move in, and property values are saved.</p>
<p>Since we are able to get in on the cheap, we can pass the savings on to you. Bought a 3/2 1700 sqfter for $600K? We'll slash that price down to a mere $350K and rebate you the difference.* Are you mad that your former builder promised you granite countertops, stainless steel appliances, and hardwood floors but hasn't delivered? No problem. Because we bought in so low, we can offer you all that plus a free 50" plasma TV.</p>
<p>But wait there's more!</p>
<p>Our sister mortgage company, Vulture Mortgage Inc., can help you convert that nasty jumbo, neg-am, option ARM loan into a standard 15 or 30 year fixed loan for an unbelievably low, low price of $99 down; $9 a month for the life of the loan. Now isn't that just a terrific deal? You no longer have to worry that in 2 or 3 years your $2000 a month payment will balloon to $5000 a month like you do with loans offerred by our imperiled competitors, namely Countywide.</p>
<p>So, call today. This is a limited time offer.</p>
<p>Dial toll-free: 555-968-7825 or visit our website at VultureBuilders.com</p>
<p> </p>
<p>*amount refunded is only based on the deposit, not the loan, of the initial home price.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Are you a depressed prospective homeowner? Frustrated that your new community is only half-built and becoming an eyesore? Worried that your once well-capitalized builder is having trouble keeping to schedule amid this housing downturn? Well don't worry; have no fear, Vulture Builders Inc. is ready and able to complete the project that your recently bankrupt home builder abandoned leaving you and your fellow neighbors-to-be in the lurch. What we do is buy the assets from the insolvent home builder for pennies on the dollar and resume development before it's too late, inviting filthy, troublesome squatters. Our experienced and licensed professionals do all the work necessary to keep the build-out on time and on schedule and take care of all the paperwork that might arise from a bankruptcy. Once we are through, all that is left is turning the house keys over to you. We ensure the neighborhood gets completed, so that families can move in, and property values are saved.</p>
<p>Since we are able to get in on the cheap, we can pass the savings on to you. Bought a 3/2 1700 sqfter for $600K? We'll slash that price down to a mere $350K and rebate you the difference.* Are you mad that your former builder promised you granite countertops, stainless steel appliances, and hardwood floors but hasn't delivered? No problem. Because we bought in so low, we can offer you all that plus a free 50" plasma TV.</p>
<p>But wait there's more!</p>
<p>Our sister mortgage company, Vulture Mortgage Inc., can help you convert that nasty jumbo, neg-am, option ARM loan into a standard 15 or 30 year fixed loan for an unbelievably low, low price of $99 down; $9 a month for the life of the loan. Now isn't that just a terrific deal? You no longer have to worry that in 2 or 3 years your $2000 a month payment will balloon to $5000 a month like you do with loans offerred by our imperiled competitors, namely Countywide.</p>
<p>So, call today. This is a limited time offer.</p>
<p>Dial toll-free: 555-968-7825 or visit our website at VultureBuilders.com</p>
<p> </p>
<p>*amount refunded is only based on the deposit, not the loan, of the initial home price.</p>