Shooby_IHB
New member
full site: www.mymomisafob.com
Geography lessons
By mmiaf | November 8, 2008
Mom: You OK? Mommy see on TV the hurricane come. It rain outside, Mommy worry for you.
Me: What channel are you watching?
Mom: CNN.
Me: And what state did they say the hurricane was in?
Mom: Florida.
Me: Where are we?
Mom: Texas? oh, Mommy understand now.
Instant messaging 101
By mmiaf | November 13, 2008
Mom: woolalasoo i am cool
Me: Yes you are, haha
Mom: i am your cool mom
Me: The coolest mom in the whole world <3
Mom: <3
<3
>3
<3
Me: Haha! You learned how to make hearts!
Mom:
Me: ?And faces apparently
Mom: ^-^
^_^
Me: Rofl hmm..
Mom: >:O
:O
>
<3
Me: <3 Haha. Okay I have to go. Talk to you later mom.
Mom: Byebye!
The sound of music
By mmiaf | November 14, 2008
Hi How are you? Is your finger ok? Thank y ou for your you-tube. I like your dj music. It is very lively and fun music. I heard a lot of yelling and screaming sound with joy in the back ground. I can tell they were enjoying your music. I couldn,t open my e mail for a long time , that is why I just found your yiu tube . byby mom
1 Comment
Posted in e-mails
(7 votes, average: 3.14 out of 5)
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Economy? Environment?
By mmiaf | November 14, 2008
Dear family
Our country is in deepest recession, people are loosing jobs, stock market is diving. We should go ?Green? this Christmas. A general guideline should be the gift should be limited to under $20(one item exception for award good student with excellent school works).
Love
Mom
Pregnancy scares
By mmiaf | November 13, 2008
Me:
Was freaking out as I haven?t had my period since August but I finally got
it on Saturday so good news, you are not going to be a grandmother
Mom:
WHA?a?a..T!! ..grandmother.???..to be pregnant u would have to be
sleeping with someone
so are u being a slut and sleeping around? Remember there is such a thing
as AIDS and it is worst than getting pregnant
Pls do not scare me?I hope u still have morales?leave your preganancy
to your other twin..and u can have the symptons in sympathy
Love
Straight to the point
By mmiaf | November 12, 2008
Hello son it is test I am learning easy way to sand text massage I love you
1 Comment
Posted in text message
(35 votes, average: 3.63 out of 5)
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Honesty is the best policy
By mmiaf | November 12, 2008
I saw some pictures that is we took from Bao-Bao?s wedding party. You
looks very, very fat especial your arm and leg. I will e-mail you when I
figual out how to e-mail you.
I know you don?t like to hear that but I think you really need to do weigh
watch out and stop to eat any sweet foods. When you age go up that will be
very difficult to do diet. Trust me.
I am you mother I always tell you truth. You need do some excise expecial
for your arm and leg.
Love
Mom
Not the dog again
By mmiaf | November 12, 2008
[Written entirely in the subject line of the e-mail, with no message]
your Hagrid, he chewing all my slipper, I will keep and show to you, you better replace for me, love bye
Black men on TV
By mmiaf | November 12, 2008
[At the dinner table, speaking in Mandarin except for names]
Me: Ma, these steaks are amazing!
Bro: Mmmm, so good, wowww? thanks Ma!
Mom: Yes, and my grill is so great because it drips excess oil while it?s grilling the meat! Simple and easy to clean, and keeps us healthier. I bought one for your Aunt Jean in Taiwan, too since it?s so handy. I just love my Morgan Freeman Grill!
[Bro and I look at each other confused]
Bro: OMG? Ma? did you mean? your George Foreman Grill?
Me: AHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Mom: You two always like to pick at my English. Their names are similar okay, and they?re both nice black men I see on TV!!!!
Meat mistake
By mmiaf | November 11, 2008
KFC Worker: Welcome to KFC, can I take your order?
Mom: Yes please, can I have one bucket of chicken?
KFC Worker: Sure! White or dark meat ma?am?
Mom: Duck!? I don?t want duck! I want chicken!
Injecting buttocks
By mmiaf | November 11, 2008
[While watching an entertainment show]
Me: there is no way that man is 50! he looks 25!
Mom: you know they are actors & actresses. they cover up their wrinkles with that buttocks stuff.
Me: WHAT? buttocks?
Mom: buttocks, botox same thing.
Unintentional souvenir
By mmiaf | November 11, 2008
Me: Did you buy anything from the swapmeet today?
Mom: Yes, I got CD holder?.and this hat.
Me: MOM! Do you know whats on that hat?!?!
Mom: Yes, it?s a city in Mexico. The hat was on sale.
Me: MOM! The city is TIJUANA not MARIJUANA!
Analogies by Mom
By mmiaf | November 10, 2008
Yes, Fremont is lower than 60 degree at night?.
Be sure to sleep 9 hours, however, remember even if you miss one night?s sleep, it will take many many days to recover, to regain the energy. Especially, the pimples won?t remember that you are catching up the sleep later on. When I travel overseas and suffer from jetlag, the payoff later on is PIMPLES POPPING UP LIKE DAFFODIES IN THE SPRING, and lowering immune system and malfunction of digestive problems?.
I understand it is unavoidable as a college student, just like it is inevitable as a frequent traveller struggling for time difference.
Cheers and hope you are here so I can prepare soup to replenish your immune system?.
Mom
Shopping list miscommunication
By mmiaf | November 9, 2008
My mom owned a fast food restaurant and on her to-buy list the following was written down:
Hat Dug Beg
I read it for awhile until I realized she wanted to buy ?hot dog bags.?
Male enhancement
By mmiaf | November 8, 2008
[Commercial for Enzyte (natural male enhancement) comes on TV]
Mom: I don?t understand what this commercial about.
Me: Um?
Mom: He?s always smiling. Is it for teeth whitening?
The PetSmart abortion clinic
By mmiaf | November 8, 2008
Mom: Excuse me, how much for abortion?
PetSmart employee: (whispering) We don?t do abortions here.
Mom: But I saw sign outside.
PetSmart employee: (again whispering) That?s not abortion, that?s adoption.
Like?PAM? cooking spray?
By mmiaf | November 6, 2008
Mom: Why is in the bathroom? This should put in kitchen?
Me: Why would it be in the kitchen?
Mom: This is thing for eating.
Me: What?!??
Mom: Look it say ?Bread Butter.?
Me: No mom, it says ?Beard Buster.?
Jokery shopping
By mmiaf | November 6, 2008
Mom: Can we go somewhere to buy something, anak?
Me: Where?
Mom: Oh, what?s the name of that store? Joker? Joke? O ya, Joker Joe?s!
Me: You mean Trader Joe?s?
Mom: O ya, I forgot!
Ma?s got street cred!
By mmiaf | November 6, 2008
From: Mom
Sent: Wednesday, October 08, 2008 4:40 PM
To: Me
Subject: Re: FW: (no subject)
Fool, u don need this to know I xo u
After watching Secret Life of Bees
By mmiaf | November 6, 2008
Me: So what did you think?
Mom: It good, but also I am so glad to see the actress in better movies scripts?
Me: Which actress?
Mom: The one from Chicago. Queef Latina?
Me: ?Queen Latifah?
Mom: WhatEVER.
A post Halloween dinner
By mmiaf | November 6, 2008
Mom: Oh, one more thing. I was thinking?can I cook your Jack-o-lantern?
Me: What? No!
Mom: Haha. Otherwise it will just go in the trash
Geography lessons
By mmiaf | November 8, 2008
Mom: You OK? Mommy see on TV the hurricane come. It rain outside, Mommy worry for you.
Me: What channel are you watching?
Mom: CNN.
Me: And what state did they say the hurricane was in?
Mom: Florida.
Me: Where are we?
Mom: Texas? oh, Mommy understand now.
Instant messaging 101
By mmiaf | November 13, 2008
Mom: woolalasoo i am cool
Me: Yes you are, haha
Mom: i am your cool mom
Me: The coolest mom in the whole world <3
Mom: <3
<3
>3
<3
Me: Haha! You learned how to make hearts!
Mom:
Me: ?And faces apparently
Mom: ^-^
^_^
Me: Rofl hmm..
Mom: >:O
:O
>
<3
Me: <3 Haha. Okay I have to go. Talk to you later mom.
Mom: Byebye!
The sound of music
By mmiaf | November 14, 2008
Hi How are you? Is your finger ok? Thank y ou for your you-tube. I like your dj music. It is very lively and fun music. I heard a lot of yelling and screaming sound with joy in the back ground. I can tell they were enjoying your music. I couldn,t open my e mail for a long time , that is why I just found your yiu tube . byby mom
1 Comment
Posted in e-mails
(7 votes, average: 3.14 out of 5)
Loading ...
Economy? Environment?
By mmiaf | November 14, 2008
Dear family
Our country is in deepest recession, people are loosing jobs, stock market is diving. We should go ?Green? this Christmas. A general guideline should be the gift should be limited to under $20(one item exception for award good student with excellent school works).
Love
Mom
Pregnancy scares
By mmiaf | November 13, 2008
Me:
Was freaking out as I haven?t had my period since August but I finally got
it on Saturday so good news, you are not going to be a grandmother
Mom:
WHA?a?a..T!! ..grandmother.???..to be pregnant u would have to be
sleeping with someone
so are u being a slut and sleeping around? Remember there is such a thing
as AIDS and it is worst than getting pregnant
Pls do not scare me?I hope u still have morales?leave your preganancy
to your other twin..and u can have the symptons in sympathy
Love
Straight to the point
By mmiaf | November 12, 2008
Hello son it is test I am learning easy way to sand text massage I love you
1 Comment
Posted in text message
(35 votes, average: 3.63 out of 5)
Loading ...
Honesty is the best policy
By mmiaf | November 12, 2008
I saw some pictures that is we took from Bao-Bao?s wedding party. You
looks very, very fat especial your arm and leg. I will e-mail you when I
figual out how to e-mail you.
I know you don?t like to hear that but I think you really need to do weigh
watch out and stop to eat any sweet foods. When you age go up that will be
very difficult to do diet. Trust me.
I am you mother I always tell you truth. You need do some excise expecial
for your arm and leg.
Love
Mom
Not the dog again
By mmiaf | November 12, 2008
[Written entirely in the subject line of the e-mail, with no message]
your Hagrid, he chewing all my slipper, I will keep and show to you, you better replace for me, love bye
Black men on TV
By mmiaf | November 12, 2008
[At the dinner table, speaking in Mandarin except for names]
Me: Ma, these steaks are amazing!
Bro: Mmmm, so good, wowww? thanks Ma!
Mom: Yes, and my grill is so great because it drips excess oil while it?s grilling the meat! Simple and easy to clean, and keeps us healthier. I bought one for your Aunt Jean in Taiwan, too since it?s so handy. I just love my Morgan Freeman Grill!
[Bro and I look at each other confused]
Bro: OMG? Ma? did you mean? your George Foreman Grill?
Me: AHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Mom: You two always like to pick at my English. Their names are similar okay, and they?re both nice black men I see on TV!!!!
Meat mistake
By mmiaf | November 11, 2008
KFC Worker: Welcome to KFC, can I take your order?
Mom: Yes please, can I have one bucket of chicken?
KFC Worker: Sure! White or dark meat ma?am?
Mom: Duck!? I don?t want duck! I want chicken!
Injecting buttocks
By mmiaf | November 11, 2008
[While watching an entertainment show]
Me: there is no way that man is 50! he looks 25!
Mom: you know they are actors & actresses. they cover up their wrinkles with that buttocks stuff.
Me: WHAT? buttocks?
Mom: buttocks, botox same thing.
Unintentional souvenir
By mmiaf | November 11, 2008
Me: Did you buy anything from the swapmeet today?
Mom: Yes, I got CD holder?.and this hat.
Me: MOM! Do you know whats on that hat?!?!
Mom: Yes, it?s a city in Mexico. The hat was on sale.
Me: MOM! The city is TIJUANA not MARIJUANA!
Analogies by Mom
By mmiaf | November 10, 2008
Yes, Fremont is lower than 60 degree at night?.
Be sure to sleep 9 hours, however, remember even if you miss one night?s sleep, it will take many many days to recover, to regain the energy. Especially, the pimples won?t remember that you are catching up the sleep later on. When I travel overseas and suffer from jetlag, the payoff later on is PIMPLES POPPING UP LIKE DAFFODIES IN THE SPRING, and lowering immune system and malfunction of digestive problems?.
I understand it is unavoidable as a college student, just like it is inevitable as a frequent traveller struggling for time difference.
Cheers and hope you are here so I can prepare soup to replenish your immune system?.
Mom
Shopping list miscommunication
By mmiaf | November 9, 2008
My mom owned a fast food restaurant and on her to-buy list the following was written down:
Hat Dug Beg
I read it for awhile until I realized she wanted to buy ?hot dog bags.?
Male enhancement
By mmiaf | November 8, 2008
[Commercial for Enzyte (natural male enhancement) comes on TV]
Mom: I don?t understand what this commercial about.
Me: Um?
Mom: He?s always smiling. Is it for teeth whitening?
The PetSmart abortion clinic
By mmiaf | November 8, 2008
Mom: Excuse me, how much for abortion?
PetSmart employee: (whispering) We don?t do abortions here.
Mom: But I saw sign outside.
PetSmart employee: (again whispering) That?s not abortion, that?s adoption.
Like?PAM? cooking spray?
By mmiaf | November 6, 2008
Mom: Why is in the bathroom? This should put in kitchen?
Me: Why would it be in the kitchen?
Mom: This is thing for eating.
Me: What?!??
Mom: Look it say ?Bread Butter.?
Me: No mom, it says ?Beard Buster.?
Jokery shopping
By mmiaf | November 6, 2008
Mom: Can we go somewhere to buy something, anak?
Me: Where?
Mom: Oh, what?s the name of that store? Joker? Joke? O ya, Joker Joe?s!
Me: You mean Trader Joe?s?
Mom: O ya, I forgot!
Ma?s got street cred!
By mmiaf | November 6, 2008
From: Mom
Sent: Wednesday, October 08, 2008 4:40 PM
To: Me
Subject: Re: FW: (no subject)
Fool, u don need this to know I xo u
After watching Secret Life of Bees
By mmiaf | November 6, 2008
Me: So what did you think?
Mom: It good, but also I am so glad to see the actress in better movies scripts?
Me: Which actress?
Mom: The one from Chicago. Queef Latina?
Me: ?Queen Latifah?
Mom: WhatEVER.
A post Halloween dinner
By mmiaf | November 6, 2008
Mom: Oh, one more thing. I was thinking?can I cook your Jack-o-lantern?
Me: What? No!
Mom: Haha. Otherwise it will just go in the trash
