The escrow/title/ and lender all have a pretty firm grasp on your naughty bits when you're sitting at the closing table asking for a discount on fees. You'll often hear "no", then experience a sharp squeeze just to let you know who's in control. Others will relent a bit - $50 here, $25 there, but nothing spectacular will come of it.
The lender has to get an Estimated HUD-1 two to three days into the escrow in order to push out their Good Faith Estimate. That's the time to begin asking about fees. Escrow, or the lender, can send over a copy of that HUD-1 anytime. Best to scan the fees then and ask for a measured discount well before you're scrunched over the closing table in that most vulnerable position of weakness.
Many of the strange fees on the HUD are in fact real costs - "Sub-Escrow" and "Endorsements" often are the biggest puzzles to buyers. By getting the HUD early, you can ask about what these costs represent. The impression of high fees can be one of real charges poorly explained, or there can be actual over charging.
Professional Realtor's pick closing and title services that are great at what they do, while having reasonable and fair prices. It's somewhat rare today to run into a shop that gouges like we saw in the mid 2000's.
My .02c