We moved to Irvine for the excellent schools but eight years later, the reality is just too much. I am all for hard work and healthy competition, but expectations from kids seem to be unrealistic. I'm hearing about families moving out of Irvine to get their kids out of this rat race. Any thoughts? Are other good school districts becoming popular? I just want my kid to be a kid and not a robot racing through a day at school followed by Kumon and Writing Class and homework and building a Rube Goldberg Machine at age 11.
IUSD schools vs other districts
- Thread starter larkfield
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Out of curiosity, can you give out more examples why the competition is too much? Or Stonegate is much more competitive than our schools in south Irvine?
Our school usually requires <30 min daily homework and extra reading time. At back to school night, the teachers usually hint that they can understand if the project is from kids' hands or parents' hands. Therefore we never help in quarter project. Our kids still get good grades. I did know a lot of people taking math classes at A*** Academy, but that is for algebra placement. I heard people taking Kumon and writing classes. But I did not have chance to talk to parents with kids taking those classes.
I don't know your specific situation but IUSD is well thought of because it is competitive. Many of the parents are 1) highly educated and intelligent, 2) greatly value education and hardwork, and 3) come from countries with highly competitive educational system.
It's your call as a parent to determine the "expectation" of the child. It's no different than the "Tiger Mom" debate...many Asians are Tiger Parents but many are not. If you think that getting into an Ivy League program is minimum for your child, then your expectations are going to be very high.
nosuchreality
Well-known member
Well rumor has it in TUSD the kids complete their own California Mission projects.
Kangen.Irvine
Active member
Every District has something to offer, don't just move for the name, but actually do your research for the programs you wish for your kids to be involved with. By programs, I am referring to academic small learning communities. AP and IB classes are everywhere, but the students will be in a super competitive environment where someone better is probably going to exist. Why not earn the guaranteed college credit by enrolling in community college courses for free instead of hoping to pass an exam that colleges are not guaranteed to accept.
Newport Mesa is working on some SLCs for Costa Mesa and Estancia HSs. Probably the best program I have run into would be the health science institute at Trabuco Hills.
Having your kids involved with these types of programs guarantees certain teachers, which makes a difference in a student's high school experience.
Newport Mesa is working on some SLCs for Costa Mesa and Estancia HSs. Probably the best program I have run into would be the health science institute at Trabuco Hills.
Having your kids involved with these types of programs guarantees certain teachers, which makes a difference in a student's high school experience.
larkfield said:
Out of curiosity, can you give out more examples why the competition is too much? Or Stonegate is much more competitive than our schools in south Irvine?
Our school usually requires <30 min daily homework and extra reading time. At back to school night, the teachers usually hint that they can understand if the project is from kids' hands or parents' hands. Therefore we never help in quarter project. Our kids still get good grades. I did know a lot of people taking math classes at A*** Academy, but that is for algebra placement. I heard people taking Kumon and writing classes. But I did not have chance to talk to parents with kids taking those classes.
The Motor Court Company
Well-known member
Beckman HS's API is pretty good if you exclude the Latino students.
quizzer said:
Irvinecommuter
New member
larkfield said:
I don't know your specific situation but IUSD is well thought of because it is competitive. Many of the parents are 1) highly educated and intelligent, 2) greatly value education and hardwork, and 3) come from countries with highly competitive educational system.
It's your call as a parent to determine the "expectation" of the child. It's no different than the "Tiger Mom" debate...many Asians are Tiger Parents but many are not. If you think that getting into an Ivy League program is minimum for your child, then your expectations are going to be very high.
I agree with the original poster, however I don't really think it is any better anywhere else. I think we as a society put too much pressure on our kids. As competition for "good" colleges ratchets up, pressure on our kids ratchets up, and the desire for perfection does too. A "B" is now the equivalent of a "C" or even a "D" and kids are burning out, stressed out, and miserable. And so are parents.
Given the fact that we can't change society, I think the parents whose motto is "better faster better faster!!" get to raise their kids that way (lots of those in Irvine) and those whose motto is "try hard, learn from mistakes, and also try to enjoy life" get to raise their kids that way. And we shall see who turns out more well-balanced and happier in the end.
On a related sidenote: a study quoted in the book "How to Raise an Adult" written by a Stanford Counselor who sees stressed out kids all day, everyday, said that some 75% of parents (I'm working off memory here so don't quote me), if given the choice, would rather have kids who go to Stanford and are struggling & depressed to the level of being on medication and in therapy, than go to a lower-level State school, while being happy and successful. What does this say about our society?
In summary, I really think it's about your personal philosophy. I really want to believe I can raise happy, successful, well-balanced kids who go on to college in a field they really love, moving on to a profession they enjoy, who have fun times, good friends, happy drunken fun-loving evenings with music and laughter, and good jobs--- the whole 9 yards! I think I can do this in Irvine! I just think it's hard. Really F***in' hard.
Given the fact that we can't change society, I think the parents whose motto is "better faster better faster!!" get to raise their kids that way (lots of those in Irvine) and those whose motto is "try hard, learn from mistakes, and also try to enjoy life" get to raise their kids that way. And we shall see who turns out more well-balanced and happier in the end.
On a related sidenote: a study quoted in the book "How to Raise an Adult" written by a Stanford Counselor who sees stressed out kids all day, everyday, said that some 75% of parents (I'm working off memory here so don't quote me), if given the choice, would rather have kids who go to Stanford and are struggling & depressed to the level of being on medication and in therapy, than go to a lower-level State school, while being happy and successful. What does this say about our society?
In summary, I really think it's about your personal philosophy. I really want to believe I can raise happy, successful, well-balanced kids who go on to college in a field they really love, moving on to a profession they enjoy, who have fun times, good friends, happy drunken fun-loving evenings with music and laughter, and good jobs--- the whole 9 yards! I think I can do this in Irvine! I just think it's hard. Really F***in' hard.
Would it be possible for your kid can be a "just a kid" in IUSD and be happy? He/she can study less, get average grades, go to a lesser-name college but then be more successful (and happy!) in life than any of the over-Kumon-ized and stressed out Irvine overachievers. Or is your goal for your kid to be the "best" in a lower-performing crowd? My kids are also in IUSD. It is not my goal for them to collect every gold star and win every competition. I went to a top school and 1/2 of my class was already on meds by their 30s, unhappy, overworked, depressed, stressed out and exiting their demanding careers in droves. Drugs, alcohol and suicide are not uncommon. No way I want that for my kids! I don't blame you for seeking a more balanced environment 
BTW, I recently asked a typical Irvine overachiever why she wanted to study premed in college and not dance (she was already an accomplished dancer in HS) and she did not a coherent answer for me. My question caught her by surprise. I felt very sad for her.
Look, right now the reality for Irvine high school students is quite skewed, as they think that there is a direct relationship between getting into a top college and life success (I thought that too, when I was in HS). You and I both know this is not the case, but it is hard to resist the popular trend. If you can find a way to take advantage of Irvine school resources and resist the "overachieving madness" trap, then your kid will be fine. Easier said than done, I know.
BTW, I recently asked a typical Irvine overachiever why she wanted to study premed in college and not dance (she was already an accomplished dancer in HS) and she did not a coherent answer for me. My question caught her by surprise. I felt very sad for her.
Look, right now the reality for Irvine high school students is quite skewed, as they think that there is a direct relationship between getting into a top college and life success (I thought that too, when I was in HS). You and I both know this is not the case, but it is hard to resist the popular trend. If you can find a way to take advantage of Irvine school resources and resist the "overachieving madness" trap, then your kid will be fine. Easier said than done, I know.